Listen to Episode 81 to hear how you can win a free pair of shoes from lalotactical.com
By listening you might also hear some pretty rad shit on how to create some
You can listen to this episode below or subscribe to never miss an episode here: revo.pt/yourrevolutionpodcast
They’re shoes that get this sort of response…
Jane Erbacher: For a while now, I’ve been looking for somebody to work with on the podcast who aligns with our message, and I’ve found them in LALO Tactical. Anybody who knows me knows that I love shoes, and what kind of shoes am I usually in? Well, definitely ones that go with my 24/7 activewear, so trainers, obviously. Well, LALO Tactical have built a shoe that is lightweight, breathable, good looking, and able to be cross trained or run in.
What I really like about LALO is that they are not just about creating the best product possible, but they are based on the underlying message that we must choose our own path, whatever that may be, and do it with purpose, hard work, and determination. I met LALO through Gym Jones two years ago, and since then, I’ve not only felt and witnessed firsthand the benefits of their product, but I’ve seen their engagement with the community and they are the real deal. They are living with purpose. They work hard, and they’re determined to have an impact. If they weren’t as great as I’m saying, I would not be aligned with them.
So what does this mean for you? Well, for Your Revolution listeners, LALO have an offer. Buy any athletic shoe on the LALO website at 30% off by using the promo code BeBetter30. Their athletic designs put an emphasis on noise reduction, support, and overall performance. LALO athletic shoes really are gear that hit the mark time after time. This offer is valid until October 31st, 2017. Shipping is not included and you must set up a profile for the code to work on the website. It is available only on the US website.
As well as this, LALO and I would love to give away some shoes, and you don’t just have to be in the US to win. Simply share the podcast, any episode you like, on social media and tag me in it. @Jane.Erbacher. Then, you’ll go into the draw to win a pair. You have until September 22nd to enter. For anymore info on LALO’s range, you can check out LALOTactical.com. I hope that you like the episode.
Hello and welcome to the Your Revolution Podcast. The Your Revolution Podcast is a collaboration between Revolution Personal and Performance Training in Melbourne and The Me Project. The purpose of the Your Revolution Podcast is to inspire you on your mission of betterment. Each week on the podcast, you’ll meet game changers who have created extraordinary lives, and you’ll listen to stories and lessons to empower you to make the changes necessary to your life. The Your Revolution Podcast is committed to fitness, health, nutrition, mindset, community, education, empowerment, and betterment, and we hope that you can take what you learn here and apply it to your very own revolution.
Hello and welcome to this week’s episode of the Your Revolution Podcast. My name’s Jane Erbacher and I’m your host. Back in Salt Lake City, I absolutely love this place. You’ve probably heard me every time I’ve spoken in the last two months say how much I love whatever place I’m in, which is true, because that’s where I go. I go to places that I love, and if I don’t like them, I probably don’t go back to tell the truth. I was trying to do the whole “find a positive in everything,” but no, that’s kind of how I roll. I like to go to places that I like, and Salt Lake City is one of those places.
The main reason for that has to be that this place is surrounded by mountains and I love mountains. I love nature. I’m pretty pro-anything that has animals and flowers and real Earth stuff. I don’t know how else to explain it, but I’m absolutely obsessed with the mountains. It’s really cool. We’re actually staying up in Park City which is somewhere where the Olympics, the winter Olympics were a few years ago, so every morning I get to wake up and look out my window at incredible mountains and every morning I get to get up and go for … I’m going to use the term jog, loosely, because we’re at pretty high altitude and it’s pretty steep, but I go for a little jog on the trails, and it’s just an incredible way to start the day.
That’s what’s going on with me. Last week I had the Gym Jones Advanced Seminar, which I helped out at, which was pretty cool. Last year I did my level three and got put through my paces, and this year I got to encourage other people who were being put through their paces, and it was a really great, great, great week. I met some really great people and I’m so excited because be running some fundamentals and intermediate Gym Jones seminars when we come back to Australia, when I come back to Australia with my good friend, Nathan Tieppo, who owns Momentum in Melbourne. Stay tuned for that, if you’re interested in getting onboard the Gym Jones train. We’d love to help you out with that.
But what I really, really, really want to talk about today is something that’s just kept coming up this entire last two months that I’ve been travelling. I hadn’t done this episode yet because I’ve had so many great people on the last few weeks, but what I really want to talk about is something that I think about all the time, and that’s connection. More specifically, our reluctance to actually connect with each other. I guess you could call this our disconnection to connection. What do I mean by this? Well, when I look around, I see so many of us are really afraid to engage, afraid to put ourselves out there, afraid to acknowledge others, and we’re afraid to genuinely let people in.
So many of us, as a result, feel like we’re actually invisible. So many of us actually force other people to feel like they’re invisible. I feel like this isn’t just apparent in real life, but it’s becoming more and more apparent online. You’d have to say particularly in social media, so particularly with Instagram and Facebook. The funny part about this is that Facebook was actually created to improve connection for all of us, but more and more, it’s forced us to disconnect from each other. How is that? Well, I believe that’s because it’s forced us to present our highlight reel and hide our struggles.
Post pictures and videos and posts about all of the things that we want to celebrate our life, and pretend that the things that we’ve struggled with don’t exist. What I’ve come to realise over the past two months of travelling now, is how intensely I crave and search for connection. I really need to feel like I’m connected to both what I do and who is around me. The more conscious I’ve actually become of this, within myself, the more conscious I became of how disconnected so many of us actually are, both to each other and to what we’re doing.
As I said before, I’ve wanted to do this podcast for a few weeks now, and yet, I’ve really struggled to articulate my ideas and thoughts. I really hope that I don’t just ramble today, and I hope that I can intelligently articulate the importance I feel connection plays in each of our lives. A couple of weeks ago I was back in Austin, Texas, and this place has seriously found a permanent spot in my heart. I absolutely love it there. I love the outdoors, I love the food, but most of all, I love the people. They’re socially aware, they’re healthy, they’re fit, they’re driven, and they’re really, really polite.
I feel like this is a combination that is quite rare. So, my boyfriend Jake and I decide not to hire a car, because we thought that it would be more fun to walk everywhere. We’d just come from New York City, and New York is such a walking city that we really wanted to keep up walking each day, because we felt like not only was it good to be moving, but it was a really great way to actually see somewhere. One night we were, well it was kind of late afternoon, so the sun was still beating down, but we were waiting for an Uber, and it was taking forever.
We were stranded roadside and it was hot. When the Uber finally arrived, Jake and I were pretty annoyed. We’d come from New York where you could get whatever you wanted, whenever you wanted it, and you did not wait in New York City. So, we jump in this Uber and we’re welcomed with this profuse apology from a really stressed and pretty old lady. She told us that the app had been playing up and it kept sending her off course. We told her it was fine and not to worry. She said she felt terrible and as a result, she actually cancelled the trip but told us that she was still going to drive us there.
We insisted that she paid, but she was like, “No, you’re not paying. I feel terrible, I’m so sorry.” As she was talking to us, I inspected her closely. I noticed on her hands and in her arms, she had what appeared to be like homemade tattoos, and not that I have a huge experience with it, but it was kind of what you would imagine someone had done in prison, or something like that. It just really seemed looking at her, that she had had a really difficult life. She appeared like beaten down and quite … What’s the word? Like harrowed looking, like stressed and just like her life had been difficult.
I decided I’d ask her how her day had been. She replied, almost out of relief that someone had even asked her, and she said that it had been a terrible day, and that she’s been having heaps of trouble with Uber, and they kept cancelling her rides. As a result, had had very little work, even though she’d been working 10 hours that day. I really noticed that after explaining her situation, she thanked us for asking and listening. It made me realise that nobody listens to her. She’s invisible. She’s there to do a temporary job and then she’s forgotten about.
She’s there to provide a service and in the process, she’s often completely ignored. She was so grateful that we humanised her, that we’d acknowledged her, that we’d validated that she deserved to have her story told. It was exactly the experience I needed to have that day in order to remind myself that I wasn’t the centre of the universe, that my life wasn’t just about me, but rather opening myself up to other people’s stories was just as important, if not more important than sharing my own.
So the next day we decided to catch another Uber, so much for our walking around. We decided to support the local Uber economy. This time the man who picked us up reminded me of my dad. Dad, if you’re listening, which you better be, dad was my only listener for a few months just in case you’re all wondering, but dad if you’re listening, yes, he was old. He was actually older than you. Anyway, we got in and we said the usual socially acceptable greetings, and then I just couldn’t wait any longer. I asked, “Do you drive an Uber full time?” I decided this was my way in to find out somebody’s story without making any assumptions or stereotyping anybody, so I thought.
I did, I have to say, assume that being in America and him being so old, that he was driving an Uber because he was struggling for cash since retiring. But what he told us was that he’d actually started driving an Uber so that he had something to do, and also, so that he could use the money to buy his girlfriend a new car. It turns out that he was actually an engineer for Hewlett-Packard for 40 years. Jake and I were really interested in this and we could not believe, and we told him, that we couldn’t believe what an incredible period of time that must have been to work in tech.
40 years, the last 40 years, he stopped there five years ago, so the last 40 years, figure that out. I don’t know, but the changes in the technology industry would have been incredible. Anyway, Jake asked him what his favourite project he worked on was. He told us that he worked on the atomic clocks used to prove time travel. I had no idea what he was talking about, and all I could think of was Marty McFly in “Back To The Future.” But, it turns out that the atomic clocks demonstrate that every year a second is added to the calendar because the rate the Earth is spinning is slowing down.
However, what’s happened over the last four decades is that only a total of four seconds have been added rather than a second a year. The reason for that is actually climate change. As the globe warms, the ice in the arctic is melting, which in turn is forcing the Earth to spin faster. What I loved about this conversation was that completely out of nowhere, I was given a science lesson, and the conversation steered towards one of my favourite topics, politics.
The Uber driver went on to talk about how disappointed and appalled he was that his President not only denied climate change, but was actively working towards causing more damage to the environment. This guy was seriously so smart and so interesting. Being a bit of a hopeless romantic that I am, I asked him about the girlfriend that he’d mentioned earlier. He said that he had managed to buy her a car with his Uber earnings, and that they were actually engaged.
He told us that he had asked her to marry him 45 years ago when he was 41, and she had said no. She was 28 at the time and felt that was way too young to get married. I did some maths in my head and realised that this guy was 86. He looked no older than 65, and he looked like a fit and healthy 65. Anyway, he went on to tell us that he had married another lady, and only divorced her five years ago. When they divorced, he looked up the lady who was his current girlfriend. Her name was the same, because she had never married. He got in touch and now they are engaged. I seriously loved this story. I got out of the Uber blown away by the conversation.
Okay, I’ve got one more, and this happened the next day. I know, I couldn’t even make this shit up. So, the last Uber story I’ll tell you, basically the guy who picked us up was … To set the scene, he was like the dad who lives next door. Like, totally normal looking, middle aged, just normal looking guy. I asked him if he drove an Uber full time. He said that he was actually a firefighter and he was trying to earn a few extra dollars to put his daughter through her final year of college. I asked him what she was studying. He said she was a sociology major trying to get into law.
I was like, “I was a sociology major, and I do law.” The conversation quickly went to how she’s trying to do human rights law and how she’s obsessed with helping people. I think you all know that I love that stuff. Anyway, this guy seriously lit up when he talked about his daughter, and Jake and I both picked up on it. He told us that they’d struggled with IVF for years after she was born, to try and have another baby, but they just couldn’t. So now they’ve spent the last two years waiting to adopt. I could not believe how open and honest this guy was.
Somehow in a 15 minute ride, we had learned both what was the most important thing to him, which is his family, and also the struggles he had had to provide for them and sustain their life. Each of these rides reminds me of how we all have the opportunity to humanise and validate each other daily, and that we barely ever take it. How many times do you not look up when you’re engaging in conversation? Or how many times do you distract yourself with your phone, your food, TV, or just nothing to prevent true engagement?
We all know what it feels like to not be heard or seen, so then why do we keep doing it to each other? This last week at Gym Jones, I’ve been reminded about how we all crave connection. Both to what we are doing and to each other. Gym Jones attracts people who genuinely want more for their life and it always surprises me about how rare this actually is, but every day I drove home thinking about how much I enjoyed seeing people lay it all on the line in training, and as a result, build an indisputable bond with each other.
This is connection, and it happens through struggle, as much as it happens through celebration. Each of those Uber drivers allowed us in by talking about a pain point in their life. For Becki, it was invisibility. For Ross, it was being rejected, and for Chris, it was the inability to provide his wife with a second child. We got to know each of them because they didn’t just skim over their pain and chit chat superficially. They let us in. That is true connection, and the impact that is left on both Jake and I will be lasting.
We are all so used to chit chatting our way through our life and our days, pretending everything is okay, and presenting our highlight reel to impress each other. Social media has perpetuated this weakness in us, and that’s why for so many of us, Instagram is a huge source of frustration. Here’s what I think. Nobody ever asks me, but I will tell you anyway. Here is what I think. I really think that social media is a microcosm for the rest of our lives. Instagram is the outward expression of our perceived highlight reel. “What would somebody think of me if I post this? If I say this? If I show this side of myself to the world?”
We use filters, we take multiple shots, and we perfect the angle to show our best side and to hide our flaws. We accompany our curated pictures with perfectly formed captions that have taken longer than they should have to post. And why? Because we’re obsessed with the perception the world supposedly has of us. How is that different to real life? It’s not. We want people to think a certain thing about us and we’ll volunteer information to support that. Both visually and verbally.
But that’s not where the magic occurs. The magic occurs in the unpredictable, the honest, and in true engagement. If the juice of life is what you’re after, you need to ask yourself, “Do I engage with the people around me? Do I ask questions? Do I volunteer honest answers? Do I listen without distraction?” This is where connection occurs in real life, and online, I have a bunch of coaching clients that I’m working with on how to use Instagram for business. The work we do is all in the outflowing of engagement. Rather than using Instagram as a space to announce your achievements, use it as a forum to celebrate somebody else’s.
We all desperately want to be acknowledged and validated, whether we like to admit it or not. On Instagram, this occurs via genuine and honest comments. In real life, it’s not that different. It occurs by celebrating someone else, by not simply puffing your chest out and announcing your achievements, but by asking questions, volunteering truthful responses, and being truly interested in the human in front of you.
Why is any of this important? Because relationships, healthy, true, real relationships, are going to be your vehicle for betterment. Having a support system and being a support system is integral to success. If we want to be better then we need to be around the best. Thank you so much for listening. I really hope you liked the episode and I’ll talk to you all soon. Bye.